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Be Kind Out There - Parents Are Greiving

12/17/2014

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When I was a young family service counselor at the cemetery, I found myself out in the cemetery in late December.  It was quite cold so very few people were out visiting graves.  I entered the outside mausoleum and I noticed the Christmas gifts left by families: wreaths, crosses made of evergreen boughs, and personal gifts.  As I looked down a row, I saw something blue and wondered what it could be.  I approached. Outside a crypt I found a small tree with a baby blue hat that read, “Babies First Christmas.”  Working so close to people in grief is hard sometimes, and I wept for the family who was going to be without their new baby that Christmas.  That year we had a few families who would loose their newest addition through the holidays.  I realized in a new way that death can happen to anyone, even on Christmas.

As we move through the many holidays this, please take the time to consider that someone you know might be grieving a loss of a small one, and it might be very painful for them.  Don’t be afraid of their pain.  Sometime we are afraid of others' pain because we know it is so great, or because we might not know what to do.  If you have such a friend, be open to letting them talk about whatever they need to say or do to help them remember and grieve.   Most of all be kind and aware of others' grief this season, making that a gift of love.

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    Caroline Vuyadinov


    I graduated from St. Vladamir's Orthodox Theological Seminary in Crestwood, New York with a Master of Divinity.  I trained as a chaplain following graduation and worked with a wide variety of people. 

    When I moved to Canada, I began work in a women's halfway house in Hamilton, Ontario which worked with women in conflict with the law on a federal level.  I became the program manager and  loved working alongside the women, creating their plans for their reintegration back to the community.  I also worked as a liaison with the parole board, parole officers and other community service providers.

    Upon my return to the United States, I worked in the Death Care Industry as a Family Service Counselor, which lead me to become a green burial advocate. I co-founded Midwest Green Burial Society with Juliann Salinas. I speak  to community groups and have developed practical seminars for a variety of audiences.  I have been interviewed on a national podcast and was featured on a WGN spot dealing with green burial. 

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