Tree on the Grave

My sister and I grew up without Santa, which some have thought was a terrible thing to do to small children.  What they don’t know was that my dad was Santa.  We received gifts from Santa in my father’s familiar handwriting all our lives, and we always thank dad for the gifts.  My parents always brought us to see Santa at the mall, and it was a big event.  My parents told us that Santa was kind of a game with children, and were told never to tell other children what we knew about this Santa character.  We were also children of a priest, so we always had a devotion to St. Nicholas in our family.  I don’t remember a time when I did not know that Santa Claus was a version of this saint. It was on his day that the first of the Christmas trees would go up.  Yes, I said the first of the trees.  Dad loved Christmas trees more than any other person I have ever known. Since his death, we take a tree to his grave.  We pray and we sing Christmas Carols, but we make sure he has a tree.
 
Trees and flowers on graves can be big business.  The office at a cemetery should be able to set you up with a tree, a wreath or what they call a grave blanket.  A grave blanket is a rectangular blanket of evergreens, which is placed on the grave.  Some of my clients at the cemetery did not like the blankets because they reminded them of the burial of their loved ones and I can see why.  At a burial, the flowers are placed like a mound on the grave.   If you go to the sales office to place an order, know that this is seen as a sales opportunity for the sales staff.  Basically, anytime you go into the sales office, is seen from the Family Service Counselor  point-of-view as a sales opportunity.  This time of year is no different.  The thing is, that you don’t have to purchase these items from the cemetery as long as what you want to place on the grave does not break cemetery rules.

We purchase our trees for Dad from the grocery store.  The grocery store’s flower shop section has a variety of choices for trees and wreaths and natural garland this time of year.  Many florists have a variety of choices for graves as well. If you purchase the kind of decoration for the grave that was not intended for the grave you have to know how to secure these to the ground.  For Dad’s tree, we usually use a thin bamboo dole that goes through the pot and the small drainage hole and into the ground.   This has always works well for us.  For other items, you can use a U-shaped gardening wire or bamboo.  If the ground is frozen, bamboo makes it more difficult to secure to the ground.  You have choices for your loved one’s grave, and you do not have to feel like you need to purchase from the cemetery. All you must know is that it follows cemetery rules.