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End of Year Assessment - Taking Action in the New Year

12/28/2016

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When we come to the close of the year, we take stock of the things we have done and left undone. One important thing to do as adults is to make plans for our death. Some of us have made plans for our death; some of us have decided that it’s too big a subject to tackle.  That is true.  Death care and plans can be overwhelming at times especially when you consider the fact we have to come to terms with our own mortality.  Who likes thinking that our lives will one day be over?  Who likes thinking that one-day our loved ones will have to take care of the myriad of details that often accompany death?  I think most of us just don’t like thinking about it.  I know I don’t.  What I do know is that these topics are vital to think about and make plans so that our loved ones are not left wondering what to do.
 
The best way to get through the unpleasant feelings of inaction is take action.  One of the best ways to get over this fear is to shop around.  By actually going to service providers you will have a good idea what you are dealing with and much of the mystique will disappear. Make a list of your local providers.  Once you are armed with the knowledge of your rights you can go out on your own. Shopping for a funeral or for cemetery space can be something you do once a week or once a month.  A single shopping experience might take a half an hour.  Once you have completed the shop, take notes about what you liked and did not like about the provider.  This is just a fact-finding exercise. It allows you to see what kinds of things are available to you and gives you a chance to ask questions when you are not feeling the pressure to purchase services like you would in an at need circumstance.  It should free you and make you more at ease with the process of making plans.
 
Shopping without the necessity to buy immediately opens you up to seeing clearly how the industry works so that you can make your plan.  Once you know how it works, the process becomes clearer.  Once you have put your toe into the process and begin to take ownership of the plan, fear and uncomfortable feelings should slip away.  Once you take the pall off the industry for yourself, then they are no longer like the Wizard of Oz on the throne and become more like the man behind the curtain.  Knowing the process, making plans, and being open with our families are ways to take back the mystery of the death care industry.  Death comes and we need to know what to do for our families and us.  Being prepared is truly a gift of love to those who love us. This old year is coming to a close, we take stock in the things we have done.  We make plans for things we have left undone.  Let us make further strides in our making our plans and ownership of the knowledge of the death care industry.

#preplanning, #planningfuneral, #funeralrule, #deathcareindustry


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    Caroline Vuyadinov


    I graduated from St. Vladamir's Orthodox Theological Seminary in Crestwood, New York with a Master of Divinity.  I trained as a chaplain following graduation and worked with a wide variety of people. 

    When I moved to Canada, I began work in a women's halfway house in Hamilton, Ontario which worked with women in conflict with the law on a federal level.  I became the program manager and  loved working alongside the women, creating their plans for their reintegration back to the community.  I also worked as a liaison with the parole board, parole officers and other community service providers.

    Upon my return to the United States, I worked in the Death Care Industry as a Family Service Counselor, which lead me to become a green burial advocate. I co-founded Midwest Green Burial Society with Juliann Salinas. I speak  to community groups and have developed practical seminars for a variety of audiences.  I have been interviewed on a national podcast and was featured on a WGN spot dealing with green burial. 

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