Beyond the Pall
New Post Every Wednesday
  • Blog
  • About
  • Contact

How to Plan the Plan

9/21/2016

0 Comments

 
Picture
You know you need to make a funeral plan, but you don’t know where to begin.  Here’s a simple outline to get you started:
 
Who:
  • Who will be in charge of your body at the time of death?  Almost always the person who claims the body is the next of kin.  If you do not know who this will be, you need to appoint someone close to you who will take care of your body in death.  This person may need to be named in a will or other legal document.  Be sure this person will follow your wishes.
  • Who will perform/lead your funeral or memorial?  If you belong to a faith/spiritual community, the leader of your community would most likely lead your funeral.  If your family does not belong to the same faith community you could consult those close to you and see who would be willing to take this on.  If you wish to have someone outside your family and friends, you could choose a secular celebrant who performs life transitional rites such as funerals. 
  • Who needs to care for/ prepare your body in death?  Death Doula?  Funeral Director? Faith Community?
  • Who might be asked to be pallbearers?
  • Who might be asked to prepare the food? Catered? Potluck?
  • Who might be asked to prepare the music for the funeral wake or post funeral gathering?
  • Who needs to be told about your death?  Include who should be told who might be outside certain social circles.  If you have people you want told, you might want to include their contact information.  If you do not wish social media used upon your death, you need to include this as well. 
What:
  • What kind of death you do you want?  By this I mean, what medically do you want done to prolong your life? Do you wish to die at home if possible?  When is it time for your family to let go? In answering these questions, your family will be better able to make choices when you no longer can.  They will also be able to feel more comfortable doing what they know you would wish. 
  • What do you wish to be buried in?  Casket or shroud?  Urn?  What clothes you wish used. 
  • What kind of funeral, wake, post funeral gathering or memorial? If you have specific ideas, make them clear.
  • What kind of flowers?  Maybe you do not wish flowers.
  • What kind of memorial donations do you wish given?
  • What kind of burial?  Are you concerned about the environment?  What steps do you wish taken to be kinder to the earth? 
  • What actions need to be taken to care for your body?  Embalming?  Green embalming? Natural, simple washing and anointing of the body?  Cremation?
Where:
  • Where should people gather?
  • Where are you to be buried?
  • Where are all your documents?
When:
  • How long after your death should people gather?  Some faith communities have specific rules regarding this.  Make sure people are aware.
How:
  • How is this paid for?  Have you prepaid anything?  If you have made sure you have kept all the documents.  If you don’t, the place of purchase might not have had all the best documentation.  Things can happen over the years, so keep everything and make sure you know what you’ve already paid for.  If you have not prepaid, how will your people get access to the funds you have set aside for your funeral and burial?  Do you have an insurance policy?  Where is that and how does it work?
Keep in Mind:
  • Even if you have planned well, you have to have communicated this with your family.
  • You need to keep in mind what your loved ones are capable of doing for you.  If you want something done at your funeral, make sure it is something easily accomplished - physically, financially, and spiritually.
  • Your death might be difficult for your loved ones, so be as kind as you can in making plans.
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.



    RSS Feed

    Caroline Vuyadinov


    I graduated from St. Vladamir's Orthodox Theological Seminary in Crestwood, New York with a Master of Divinity.  I trained as a chaplain following graduation and worked with a wide variety of people. 

    When I moved to Canada, I began work in a women's halfway house in Hamilton, Ontario which worked with women in conflict with the law on a federal level.  I became the program manager and  loved working alongside the women, creating their plans for their reintegration back to the community.  I also worked as a liaison with the parole board, parole officers and other community service providers.

    Upon my return to the United States, I worked in the Death Care Industry as a Family Service Counselor, which lead me to become a green burial advocate. I co-founded Midwest Green Burial Society with Juliann Salinas. I speak  to community groups and have developed practical seminars for a variety of audiences.  I have been interviewed on a national podcast and was featured on a WGN spot dealing with green burial. 

    Archives

    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    May 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014

    Categories

    All
    Children's Graves
    Comunicalbe Disease And Burial Practice
    Cremation
    Cremation Urns
    Cultural Conflicts And Medical World
    Death Of A Child
    Depression
    Ebola
    Family Rights
    Fear Of Death
    Fr-thomas-hopko
    Funeral Laws
    Funeral Planning
    Garden Memorial
    Green Burial
    Grieving Parents
    Heirloom Seeds
    History
    Infant Death
    Live Streaming Funerals
    Mausoleums
    Memorial
    Memorialization
    No Embalming
    Non Religious
    Orthodox
    Orthodox Christian Grave Practices
    Pre Planning
    Pre-planning
    Remembering The Dead
    Serbian Cemetery Rites
    Suicide
    Tree-memorials
    Vaults
    Zito

    RSS Feed

Proudly powered by Weebly